As a couple fall into a comfortable, long-term relationship they sometimes become careless about nurturing it and keeping the love alive. After the initial spark of infatuation wears off, problems such as money differences, religion, family differences and parenting may cause strife. Even some of the more insignificant matters can be a breaking point.
Before the relationship falls apart, both people need to determine whether or not the relationship is worth working for and saving once the infatuation starts to fade. Communication is essential, as long as it’s done without animosity and dredging up past problems that can’t be changed. Some couples can work through their differences by sitting down and having a long talk. Others may need professional counseling. Sometimes the couple simply isn’t suited to be together.
An unhappy relationship can be the result of one or many deeper issues. Certain problems seem to be common among many couples, so those areas are good places to start when trying to work through the issues. If an unmarried couple is considering marriage, getting premarital counseling or having a third party mediate with relationship support and tips may help build a solid foundation.
Religious Differences Between Partners in a Relationship
Although this may seem obvious, many couples are so infatuated with each other, they overlook something that may create significant problems later in the relationship. If the two people have strong religious views that oppose each other, they need to find a happy medium or agree to disagree and maintain their personal beliefs.
Some of the approaches at the Religious Tolerance website that may work for couples include:
- Withdrawing from religious activities
- Conversion of one partner to the other’s religion
- Compromise and finding a faith that meets in the middle
- Multi-faith acceptance
- Merging the religions
- Each person maintaining the original religious connection
Money Problems Faced by Couples
Money is one of the main sources of contention between couples – both married and long-term partners. Some people view money as something that enables them to buy whatever they want, others hoard money for a rainy day that may or may not come and there are people who fall at all levels between those two.
Before money problems arise, if the couple expects to be in a long-term committed relationship, they need to sit down and discuss their views on money. If they do this before there’s an issue, tempers aren’t as likely to flare. Unmarried couples opposing money management styles may want to consider having a “date fund” to finance extravagant dates. Couples who plan to get married should decide whether they want joint accounts, separate accounts or both.
Parenting and Children
Another source of contention between partners in a relationship is having opposing parenting styles. This is critical in all relationships – from blended families to the decision to have children in the future.
Here are some things couples need to discuss before a long-term commitment:
- Relationships with the other partner’s children if there are any
- Future children and how many
- Discipline styles
As couples commit to a long-term relationship, they need to remember that it requires work. There will be some disagreements, but if they can work through the problems before they escalate, the relationship will be much happier. Early discussion about religious differences, money problems, parenting and children will help prevent heated arguments later.